If a picture is worth a thousand words...

... then this one tells you everything you need to know about the kind of day I had:



Once again, I am turning to P90X for emotional catharsis. I am not sure if I would be feeling this way had I done the workout in the morning like I usually do, but hey... can't cry over spilled milk.

Personal note: Mr. Horton, I am two weeks into this program. I'm not seeing any magical transformations in my physique yet, but this is really helping me to get my mind right, at least. Guess I can thank you for that.

TODAY'S MENU:
BREAKFAST - Spinach omelet, 1/2 grapefruit, 8 oz skim milk, 1 cup black coffee
LUNCH - 2 meatless burger patties, carrots, 2 tbsp hummus, whey protein in 8 oz skim milk
SNACK - protein bar
DINNER - asparagus, wild rice, grilled swordfish

Taking care of where I TRULY live

Remember how I talked about learning last week that yoga was physically taxing? Learned another thing this week... they're not kidding when they say it's good for the mind and spirit. I have to tell you, I just couldn't wait to do the Yoga X workout this afternoon when I got home from collecting the rent at the house that I own in the west end of Oberlin. To me, that house symbolizes everything that went wrong for the last three years with my relationship, my professional life, and my spiritual well-being. My ex (the cat owner) says that sometimes he misses it and has a lot of good memories about the place. Not me.... not even a little bit.

I'm glad and grateful the woman who is renting it from me and her children love the place...I really am. To me, it just sucks me dry emotionally to even see it. It's the first time I have been back there and actually crossed the threshold there since I moved out. Seeing new furniture in the living room and the hallways was a good reminder that it's in the past, but it still felt icky to be there, and leaving after I got the rent felt like being paroled.

The Yoga X workout was perfect after this experience. I actually felt centered and rebalanced; probably it's because of the controlled breathing, but I also have a feeling that it's because every day that I am doing this program, I am taking care of Adam... and the body in which Adam lives.

update on 1/20/10 - Forgot to add the menu for the day. it was the same pattern, relatively speaking

I put on 5 lbs.

No, I didn't gain weight... I added the additional plates to the dumbbels like I had said I was thinking about doing last week. Another five pounds proved to be just perfect! Still feel pretty good after that workout... and I think I will attribute some of it to the swimming I did as well. Why the hell not? :) And of course, Ab Ripper X still tears me up, but I am still working on it.

It's funny.... just seeing the infomercial on TV now is all it takes to get me going in this workout. I know I have probably fallen victim to a trend diet/workout, but at least it's not one of those dumb machines like the ThighMaster or something stupid ilke that. Besides, everyone I have spoken to who has done the program raves about it.

Anyway, nothing terribly profound to share right now. Just poking along..... gonna enjoy the weekend. Yoga X tomorrow.

TODAY'S MENU
BREAKFAST - 2 soy sausage patties on a whole wheat english muffin, 1 string cheese, 4 0z OJ
SNACK - Power Bar
LUNCH - green salad, 1 oz cashews
DINNER - grilled turkey breast, serving of green beans, wild rice, scoop of whey protein in 8 oz skim milk

"Bring a Bucket..."

Mr. Horton says this in the intro to the Plyometrics X workout. I'm serious. He's right, but it's not what I thought it was for... it's for the SWEAT! Having completed my second round of Plyo (and I did finish it all the way through without dogging today!), I am completely drenched. I can't help but wonder if I sweat this much when I was swimming, but never noticed it because... well, I was in the water. Most likely, the answer is yes... and probably more than I did doing Plyo.

You know, I like the workout for Plyo X, but it's really hard on the knees. And it's hard for me to land quietly; I have absolutely no grace. My former skating instructor, whom I am still friends with on Facebook, would probably tell you that I had that problem at age 8 or 9 when I was skating competitively. Anyway, I'm just glad I have no neighbors below me (and I worry about the day that I do if I am still doing this). Would I switch to Cardio X on Plyo days if that happens? I dunno...

Oh, update from last week... Sebastian, the cat, may have a home. I called my ex and it turns out that Sebastian may be going back to New Orleans to live with my ex's partner before me (I'm "Numero dos"). That's a huge relief to know there's another possible solution. I feel much better now. What a difference a week makes!

Not "the Biggest Loser" Anymore!

Remember how close I thought I came to dying last week? Not this time! Actually made it through without thinking I was going to puke or anything. Still a little light headed from the up-and-down motion that comes from a bunch of push ups and pull ups, and that may be a battle I will continue to fight over the course of the workout and the next 12 weeks. Even so, I am seeing progress from last week already. Glad I changed my mind and did X Stretch ( a slightly less intense version of Yoga X) last night before bed. I don't think I could have gotten through this morning without it.

I also wanna thank a friend of mine in Los Angeles (and previous P90X doer) for this tip to me in regards to the diet/metabolism comment I made yesterday: "I was in the exact same situation as you. I wanted to do the program to the letter. I also have a wicked high metabolism and was left ravenous throughout the day. My advice: tailor the diet. It's what I ended up doing. I simply couldn't live in the constant state of hunger. You have to realize that the program is designed as a general template that will work for the general average. If you're not in that general average, though, you're screwed. It's just like Tony says about the workouts, "Modify, modify, modify" to suit your current fitness level. There is no reason not to "modify, modify, modify" the diet a well based on your individual needs. I upped the calories in a major way - I upped the fat, I upped the carbs. Just keep it whole foods. And I finally felt satiated. I have a 7 - 10 percent body fat, so I don't think it did me any harm. Seriously, don't torture yourself for the sake of doing it perfectly - there is no reason you should be cranky, starving and dropping pounds. Listen to your body. (And rejoice in the fact that you get a lot more leniency in how you eat - it's one of the gifts of being a hard gainer!)" Those words are worth their weight in gold.

Question for those of you reading this: should I post the exercises/reps/weight I used? Will do so if you want to see 'em.

So good luck to my friend Chris in Tennessee (same one who sent me those Dove chocolates) who is starting P90X this week, and to my other buddy Billio who is also starting the following week!

TODAYS MENU:
BREAKFAST - mushroom omelet, 1/2 grapefruit, coffee
LUNCH - green salad with cashews, a few sprays of lite Italian dressing
SNACK - protein bar
DINNER (out at Chinese buffet) - crab maki sushi (5 pieces), veggie maki sushi (4 pieces), 3 steamed meat dumplings, 4 sauteed broccoli florets, 5 small pieces of "peanut chicken", a little orange Jell-o for desert

Probably could have made better choices for dinner... oh well.

And on the seventh day he rested...

Finally made it through the first week of P90X! Boy, has this been an ass-kicker and I am glad to take the day to recoup and regroup! Even so, I am looking forward to doing it again starting tomorrow.

So... best, hardest, and worst of this week are as follows:

BEST: Just completing the week! Despite all the physical rigor, the occasional discouragement at my lack of flexibility, and the stupidity of Mr. Horton's jokes, I did it! And I figure if I made it through this week, I can make it through another one.... AND see some improvement. I kept records of the exercises, reps, and weights I was using in a separate notebook (as directed). If I can repeat or improve on that, I will be enormously satisfied. I guess that's the goal for next week.

HARDEST: The diet has been hard to stick with and enjoy. Don't get me wrong, I haven't gone off it... I'm just not liking that part. I know what some of you are going to say here, and you're right... I don't need to lose weight. I agree 100%, but as I said before, I'm doing the whole program as an experiment to see what kind of results I get, and this is part of the progra. The main reason the diet has been hard to stick with has been less about "cheating" as it has been about the fact that although I am following the plan as closely as I can (and as my budget will allow), my metabolism is so high that the food plan I have been following (calculated according to the P90X Meal Plan book) is leaving me ravenous... and cranky... and too hungry to sleep at night sometimes! I have snuck in an extra snack during these times, but at least made good choices at those times (for example, last night was a fruit salad instead of French Silk Pie). Hopefully I will get some advice from someone who has gone through this program or another fitness-minded person... even if it is just to "get used to it and shut up." However, I hopped on the scale this morning and saw that I had lost about four or five pounds after this week, which is nice in terms of a dividend, but maybe not necessary for physical health.

WORST: Getting up at 5am to do the workouts. It's not fun, but it's the only time I can do it. I hate getting up before the sun... and in the winter, there's no avoiding it anyway. Even so, I think this is something I will get used to, so I consider this a temporary problem. For whatever it's worth, my dogs actually like this schedule -- up early to pee and poo, then right back to bed while their silly biped master jumps around for a while after that. Occasionally, they look at me from my doorway while I work out, utterly perplexed... and on days when I have to lay down to do exercises (Ab Ripper X), they run over and lick me in the face. They are my cheerleaders and supporters I guess. Guess I should be grateful.

So that's the first week in a nutshell. I hope that whomever is reading my blog is getting something out of it. Comments or not, I am actually having fun writing about this and will keep you posted.

TODAY'S MENU
BREAKFAST - 2 sl, turkey bacon, cheese omelet, 1/2 grapefruit, 1 cup black coffee
LUNCH - shrimp stir-fry leftovers with peanuts, whey protein in skim milk
SNACK - Protein Bar
DINNER - 2 Boca Burger patties, snap peas, 3-4 tbsp hummus, 1 Polly-o string cheese, glass of milk b4 bed

I used to be a black belt...

No really... I was! I trained with Grandmaster Han Young Kim at Blue Dragon Tae Kwon Do in Timonium, Maryland when I was in my early teens and earned my 1st-dan black belt from him in 1988. I'm so glad he couldn't see me this morning as I did Kenpo X; he'd demand it back and forget he ever knew me, I'm sure. Ain't as flexible as I used to be at thirteen (obviously), and a lot of the old techniques I used to know that would have been helpful for this workout have worn down with age and disuse. At least I have something to aim for as I progress. And on a positive note, today I actually kept up with Mr. Horton and the kids! Maybe the years of training with Master Kim have not gone to waste after all, and maybe I'm getting out of first gear.

And boy, was it a relief to punch and kick today! Yesterday, my ex called to tell me that his cat (whom I cared for from the day he moved out until early last month) is not getting along with his new roommate's dog (blood has been drawn, from what he says), that he can't find anyone to adopt the cat, and that it's getting to the point where he may have to consider a "final solution." It just broke my heart... and it made it worse to think that I drove his pet all the way from Oberlin, OH to Northampton, MA only to find a few weeks later that he might put the cat down! Just burned me up and made me so foul-tempered for the last few hours of yesterday. Could have used the Kenpo X then, perhaps, instead of acting like an angry jerk at my meeting last evening and then driving home to be a bitter hermit!

I know it's his animal, his choice, and his responsibility. I also know that I should not feel guilty, as if I sent that animal to his doom. I will even nod in agreement when my ex says that it's not what he wants to do, but he is running out of time and options as the roommate's dog nurses his wounds and the terrified cat is under constant stress from being on red alert all the time. Still, it doesn't make it any less sour. As much as I hate to admit it, I got real attached to that animal... and for a while, I get to experience what cat owners across the globe feel for their cats. It's silly of me to mourn something that isn't dead, right? Even so, those of you who are so inclined, keep the cat, Sebastian, in your prayers.... and also my ex because (as I said) he's got a hard decision to make, and as upset as I am, I don't envy his position one bit.

Oh well... I awoke today telling myself that it was a new day, and to allow myself the grace of a fresh start. Now that I have had some sleep, sweat a few buckets thanks to Mr. Horton and company, and have written a bit about it, I feel better. Still determined to keep going, and still determined to keep looking for progress.... and MAKING IT!


Sebastian


TODAY'S MENU
BREAKFAST - coffee, protein shake, 1/2 banana
SNACK - protein bar
LUNCH - 2 oz turkey jerkey, 2 servings of baby carrots, hummus, and a serving of string cheese
DINNER - shrimp stir-fry w/o sauce